Sweet & Sassy Scribblers
​
  • Scribblings on Whatever
  • Scribblings on Empowerment
    • Healing with Vers Libre
    • Lend an Ear
  • Scribblings on Conservation
    • Through the Lens of a Nature-Lover
  • Fiction
    • Books for Children
    • Fantasy
    • Thrillers
    • Mysteries
    • Women's Fiction
    • Science Fiction
  • Nonfiction
    • Well-being
    • Spiritual Psychology
    • Poems, Essays, Etc.
  • Browse Our Library
  • Heart Song Ghostwriting
  • The Scribblers

Living in the Past

2/23/2023

0 Comments

 
You can’t keep living in the past. I know you’ve heard this before, especially if you’re older than thirty-five. If you say this to someone or God forbid, someone says it to you, the reaction the phrase receives depends on how you define it.

For example, to some being told they shouldn’t live in the past means betraying the people in their past. This could include a deceased spouse, friends, or family members.

Others may see the past as a painful reminder times have changed, and their glory days no longer seem to be a part of their lives. This response could be attached to losing a job, getting older, health problems, or other issues life presents.

So, what does “living in the past” really mean, and why can it be detrimental to the life you live in the present and the future?

> A person who, for whatever reason, has lost people in their life can develop an unhealthy attachment to their memories. Every conversation they have revolves around their place in those memories. Every opportunity that comes their way is measured against those memories. These new possibilities never have a chance of enriching their life because, as we know, memories are nearly always more golden than the reality was. The truth is that this person is shackling their present and their future to the past.

> A person who holds onto the memories of their glory days and refuses to shift their vision to possibilities in real time also has an unhealthy attachment to the past. It colors their perception of doors that open or unusual paths that appear because these are compared to past achievements and fall short of them.
​
Living in the past is not about forgetting those people you’ve lost through death or simply circumstances or underrating the success you once had. It is about all those questions that circulate in your mind. Primarily, it is about the fear of moving forward. What if you never find a relationship again as good as the ones you had? What if no one cares what you’ve achieved in the past? What if you have to start at the bottom of the ladder again? How do you figure out who you are now without what you lost? The doubts you experience when life shifts are normal. When balanced against more positive attitudes, they are even healthy. 
So, How Do You Move Forward?

First, you accept that life is a journey, not a destination.
This means the events in your past were merely stops along the way, which bring you to a crossroad. Are you refusing to continue on the journey and prefer to sit on the sidelines and stagnate? Or are you ready to step back, observe your life in all its ups and downs, and accept that the journey of your life isn’t over?
Second, you open your mind to the reality that so much of your life is influenced by your conditioning, like those memories we’ve mentioned. Habits formed over time that no longer serve you, fears that have no basis in fact, beliefs and opinions you’ve picked up from others along the way – all these are just some of the psychological debris that color your perceptions. I know you’ve heard the expression about waking up from your self-imposed sleep. This is about becoming aware of the influence of all these things on your life experiences and taking away their power over you.
At 74 years of age, I have a lot of life to look back upon. I can see all my struggles and appreciate my tenacity. I am grateful for my joys and the people who have passed through my life. I can’t allow those things I wish I had handled differently to weigh me down. If I do, I will be letting my past dictate my present and my future. I cannot live in regret. All the things that have happened in my life have combined to make me who I am today. I may not be perfect, but I like me, warts and all!

For those of you who are at earlier stages in your journey, I hope you can appreciate that both the good and the bad in your life work together to create a more wonderful you if you don’t try to remain in your past. As cliché as it may seem, life is a journey. It is not about reaching a certain place and trying to maintain. It is about evolving over time.
​
Below is the mantra I have chosen to use in what I call Act 3 of my life. Having spent twelve years caregiving for my wonderful husband of thirty-four years, I admit that his death tossed me into an alien world. I have had to regroup, so to speak, and move forward. I have no idea how many years I have left, but I cannot waste them by trying to fight the current of time. 

Picture
LIVE in the present.
PLAN for the future.
BELIEVE in myself.
STEP outside my comfort zones. 
Scribblings on Empowerment
0 Comments

Are You Walking into Doors or Through Them?

2/16/2023

2 Comments

 
Wanting a different life does not make you unusual. Statistics indicate that huge numbers of people in the United States want to be in a different occupation. Why do you think there are so many entrepreneurs in this country??
 
Despite the pull to search for happiness by changing what they do, the resistance to change for people is a powerful adversary. It's not easy to let go of what you have. The degree to which you are willing to do this determines how much and how quickly you succeed in your efforts.
 
Change is something most of us resist right up to our last breaths. People are willing to hang on to a miserable condition just because it is what they're used to. Unfortunately, their misery has become more comfortable and appealing than the risk of change.
 
A man told my husband once he had lost his job in a foundry after 22 years of loyal service. He had not been able to find another job because the industry was sending this type of work overseas. My husband suggested he go back to the local junior college and learn a new skill. He didn't think the man would take the suggestion seriously, but he fooled him. The next time he saw this man, he learned he had taken the advice and gone back to school. The man had become an accountant and was loving it!
Picture
We have to  open ourselves up to possibilities which are outside what we can imagine at the moment. Be open and receptive.
​
It is my belief that no door ever closes without another opening. The trick is learning to accept this as a possibility. This will only happen if you choose to see it this way, and if you’ve chosen to enjoy your life in spite of it all!
2 Comments

A Little Gesture Can Make A Big Difference

2/9/2023

0 Comments

 
I had an experience the other day that was uplifting. I was sitting in a restaurant when I saw a car back into another car. On impulse, I wrote down the license plate number. When I realized they were going to drive off, I gave the license # to the waitress in case they could discover the owner of the car that was struck. In a few minutes, a man came to my table. He thanked me and asked if I would give him my name and phone number.
 
Later that night, his wife called. She was so grateful—not so much for the sake of the car because there was no obvious damage—she was grateful for another reason. She said I had restored her faith in people because she didn't think anyone cared enough anymore to take the time to do what I did or get involved. She was all choked up. It took so little on my part, but look what a difference it made in her life!
 
So, when you go out today, think about the little things. Open a door for someone, smile at others. You never know—it might be the one act that helps them change their attitude about life. It costs you nothing, but it value can be immeasurable in another person's life.
 
"Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see." ~ Mark Twain
Picture
0 Comments

Your Soul Affects the World’s Progress

2/2/2023

0 Comments

 
Picture

​The Universe is always in motion. Nature is always changing. As a human being, we don’t always see this or acknowledge it because our humanness is a blink in the grand movement. This slowness of motion does not equate with inertia or signify an end to its evolution, especially when viewed by those whose physical existence is so brief.
Those among us who see the world on which we exist and the Universe in which we exist as removed from the energy of progress are known as immobilists. Their inability to see life as moving forward, progressing, are supported by attitudes such as habit of thought, pessimism, lack of morality, and even humanity. Many religions which are focused on the past fail to accept the ability of the soul to move forward in conscious awareness. 

The failure to acknowledge the mobility of the human soul slows the progress of creation. Our individual levels of conscious awareness in this human experience play a part in the forward movement of the Universe. As Teilhard de Chardin said, we are spiritual beings having a human experience. Therefore, the complexion of the world we experience is fueled in its direction of movement by the collective consciousness or the average of all those souls on this planet at any given time.

On a much smaller scale, think of the phenomenon we call mob mentality where a zealot with a poorly developed awareness gets others of similar consciousness all stirred up. Think witch trials, violent protests, overreactions by the masses. These are immobilists clinging to the past, the status quo. Little thought is given to solutions or means of moving forward because they do not believe that things can change. They might be shouting change, but their actions are not concentrated on creating a more positive, more equitable world. Their ideas about change are what has led to the popularity of the saying “the good old days.”
​
The Universe is in motion at every level. As humans with free will, we have the option to resist this motion within ourselves with every fiber of our being or move forward. Interestingly, it is the movement within the soul of every person which contributes the most to the collective consciousness and the quality of life on this plane.

Sweet & Sassy Scribblers ... on Empowerment

0 Comments

    Dannye Williamsen

    I have been studying the human psyche and its wonderful and often frustrating journey for over four decades. It was only natural that my love of writing and teaching became part of this journey. 

    My writings are dedicated to those who are willing to search  outside the box for meaning in their lives, who are willing to shift their view of the world just enough to recognize they are unique expressions, and who are willing to do the inner work to improve their understanding of who they are.

    Archives

    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023

    RSS Feed

    Picture
I will read forever because it lets me visit in my mind the worlds that I will never be able to see; it helps me put away the stresses of the day and relax into the rhythm of the story before me; it lets me bring to the surface and experience without regrets those feelings I hide away; it lets me re-experience the thrill of first love through someone else's eyes; it keeps my mind juiced so that it will never desert me; it is always there for me even when there's no one else. I will read forever no matter whether it is print or digital because the words will always call to me. ~ A Sassy Scribbler