Greta: (looking up in the tree canopy for her guest) Elmer, where are you? It’s time for our interview.
A voice responds from above: Oooo, Oooo, I forgot. I’ll be right down.
(A dark shadow zooms past Greta, stirring up leaves and debris as the tumbling creature drags a wing through the undergrowth and crashes head-first into an unmovable tree truck)
Greta: (dashing through the cloud of dust, leaves, and black feathers) Elmer! Are you all right?
Elmer: (shakes his head while stumbling away from the tree) Aww, gee, that wasn’t too good, was it? The flying part’s easy, but I think I need to work some more on my landings.
Greta: Yeah, I think that’d be a good idea.
Elmer: Okay. I’m here. But I ah, ummm, I have a question.
Greta: What do you want to know, Elmer?
Elmer: Why am I here?
Greta: I invited you to come and talk to us about being friends with Patchy and Calico.
Elmer: Oooo, Oooo, yeah. I like Patchy and Calico. They’re my friends. We go on ad… adven… ummm--
Elmer: Yeah, yeah! I don’t know what that is, but it’s fun to hang out with them. Last Halloween, Patchy wanted to meet a ghost. So, umm, I took them to a haunted house.
Elmer: Oooo, Oooo yeah, but the ghost wasn’t very friendly. Nope, nope he wasn’t nice at all. He snuck up on Patchy and Calico and--
Greta: Stop right there, Elmer. Don’t tell us what happened.
Elmer: Duhhh, why?
Greta: We want people to read the story and discover what happens.
Elmer: Oooo, it’s a surprise. I like surprises. Well, sometimes I like them, sometimes I don’t. I like them when they’re good surprises. Ahhh, will this be a good surprise? You see, I don’t want anybody to get mad at me. When people get mad at me, they--
Greta: Okay, Elmer. We get the picture. I promise no one will get mad at you.
Elmer: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Can I go on another ad… adven…, aw-shucks, another walk with Patchy and Calico? Huh? Huh? That’d be lots of fun. We can go to new places and try not to get into too much trouble.
Greta: Oh, yes. I have some more adventures in mind for you guys. I just have to get the books written up.
Elmer: What do you mean – get the books written up?
Greta: I’ll explain later. Or better yet, ask Calico. She’ll tell you all about the books she likes.
Elmer: Yeah, yeah. Calico is a smart cat. She’s all the time explaining stuff to Patchy. I listen, but it just goes whoosh over the top of my head. Yeah, it does. You know what I mean?
Greta: Yes, I understand. I think it’s time to say goodbye now, Elmer.
Elmer: It is?
Greta: Why don’t you go practice your landings? Practice makes perfect, you know.
Elmer: Oooo, yeah, yeah. Then maybe I won’t hit my head anymore.
Greta: Say goodbye, Elmer.
Elmer: Bye, bye